In this day and age some celebrate the title of being a “Side Chick”. Entertainment mediums love to romanticize the role, as if being someone’s second choice is the ideal situation. Any who, since one can’t control what others do, keeping the ball in your court and not yielding any power is necessary. People who desire “side chicks” operate like animals on the hunt. They are often looking for the weakest target. The most vulnerable, desperate, and always available, are prime picks. So, what are the three ways to avoid being targeted as a side chick?
- Set a standard. Most often, people know how to treat an individual based on what is allowed. If one is in a vulnerable place, maybe just coming off of a bad break-up, then interacting with opposite sex may not be the best thing at that moment. Often times emotions can be misplaced and suddenly you are in a compromising situation. Be still and heal.
- Desperation wears like a perfume and some can smell it a mile a way. Defuse the scent by first embracing and understanding that you are enough. Commit to loving yourself and being intentional about it. Understand that your season of singleness is just that – a season. Meaning your status as single person will not last forever. Furthermore, whatever they have promised comes with some strong strings attached to it. Strings that could choke up your destiny in life.
- Get busy doing meaningful work. If they need someone to talk to, kindly refer them back to their significant other whom they have entered into a covenant with before God. Resist the urge to have a listening ear, because often that is their way in. The sympathy card is played because that is the easiest way to access someone’s heart. Once you have the heart, you have the person. Keeping your calendar full makes saying no easier.
Making your heart a priority is very important. Pillows were made for rest not tears. Don’t let the bright lights, front laced wigs and beat faces fool you. There are some serious repercussions when one agrees to being a side chick. Take the target off your back. Be confident, loved, and purposed in life.