AngryWoman_1

In 2017, dating has become one of the hardest things to do. I contribute lack of honesty as one of the reasons. It seems that for some people, it is easier to pretend and play games rather than be honest and upfront. Some people lie like they are single when in fact, they are married or have a person they share the same address with; not to mention, they may also share a child with this person. Some people say they want a relationship, when all they really want is to have a good time with no strings attached.Then there are those people who might not lie, but they would rather avoid conversations or situations that would put them in a position to divulge certain information about themselves. Different people have different reasons for not being upfront and honest. They might fear the person will no longer be interested if they knew the truth.They might have a specific motive and being 100% honest might not allow them to get what they want. Then there are times when people simply lie or omit the truth in the beginning because they don’t feel the person they are dating has earned the right to be privy to such information. Whatever their reason may be, people need to understand that one of the most important things you can offer your mate is your ability to be transparent. Transparency is not something you start after you officially become a couple. It is something that you start during the early stages of dating.

I remember many years ago, I was out with some friends and I met a guy who seemed cool. We talked for a few weeks and then I found out he lied about his age. I was so turned off and I thought he was so lame for that.  He apologized, and as far as he was concerned, it was just  a small lie and not that big of a deal. What he didn’t understand was because he lied, I wasn’t confident that I could trust him enough to go forward. To me, what he called a small lie, spoke volumes about his character. I figured if he would lie to me about his age, then there was no telling what else he would lie about. Needless to say, I didn’t bother to stick around to find out either. That is no way to go into a relationship.

 

Having the ability to trust your partner is just one of the absolute most crucial parts of a partnership.  Without trust, it may be difficult for connections to grow and advance in a relationship.  I don’t know any person who would want to be with someone they couldn’t trust. Lack of trust breeds insecurity and stress which is a recipe for an unhealthy relationship.  There is a myth that says, people would rather hear a pretty lie when the truth is ugly. I say, if a person can’t handle your truth, then that is simply not the person for you. So keep in mind when you meet someone, what you do to get them is what you will do to keep them. If you start out being secretive and telling lies, your relationship will be built on lies and deceit. The truth might not always be pretty, but it has a way of coming out anyway. It’s like that old saying goes,  “The truth will come out in the wash, if not in the wash it will come out in the rinse.”

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