So are you still dating? Dating…humph. The word itself lends to a notion of a temporary act. Much like talking, eating, or sleeping. Momentary. Brief. I could go on, but I’ll spare you. So after 30 plus years of living, and having several failed relationships, (that were blessings in disguise, no shade), I have watched my friends and fellow single ladies dive into the abyss of “game of thrones”…also known as dating. I truly feel that dating is for entertainment or sexual pleasure. To me, it feels like it’s more for fun or sport. When I asked a close friend if she was dating, she replied, “It depends on the day of the week. I have one guy who is really good at adventure but isn’t looking for anything serious. Another guy who enjoys cooking for me and being at home, so he is my home body, and there is one prospect that I am engaging with here and there. We may be going out for drinks this Thursday afternoon.” Geeeesh. I mean how FUN is that? We get to be so many different persons when dating. Both women and men pretend, deny, mask, and keep at bay our real truths just to be “bought” and “entertained” for the moment at best.
I have my own point of view on dating that I want to share with you. Consider this; if you have a mindset that you are dating to find love or a husband, I want to throw some caution to the wind. Dating for commitment is canceled (I mean that in the most humorous yet sarcastic tone of voice). Instead, I want you to date to find yourself. Date to compile a list of what you like and don’t like. Treat it like an adventure of sorts. Take notes on how you behave and what emotions come up or how you feel when he does or doesn’t do or say something. Date as if you are enrolling in a class all about you. You feel me? If you are still considering dating as a means or a way to find love, you will be in for one wild and peculiar quest. Let love find you. By investing in thyself and loving that girl first. Learn how to be the happiest and loving YOU that you can be! Surely and magically (yes, magic) he will appear. Because he sees your heart and who you are in your most authentic self. Too fluffy? I think not. Happiness is a real thing if you are ready to embrace all you are. In the meantime, a great way to take a chill while you gather your best self, check out the new season of HBO’s Insecure this Summer, airing July 23rd. Check your local TV listings for details.
Rebel on, – Antres