by: @lauranslane

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Everywhere you look, there are “baby bumps”, baby showers/sprinkles, baby “sip n see” events, and more and more cute baby clothes to set anyone in a frenzy. It seems trendy now to see who can get the most extravagant baby shower, and these aren’t just showers…they are actually “small productions”!

Have you ever stopped to think about those who are looking into their own future, hopeful for the blessing of a family? There are so many women who are anxious to carry, anxious to parent, and anxious to experience life as a new Mom. Maybe this someone is YOU. If so, then this is specifically for you: the woman who is Patiently Waiting To Parent.

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I recently took a poll from 10 women who are not Mothers, but hoping to be Mothers (I asked this question of a few friends and associates in passing). The poll question was “what is stopping you from having children?”

3 responses: waiting for marriage first

4 responses: medical conditions causing issues with carrying a child to term

2 responses: career comes first right now

1 response: currently trying

Some seem to think that the majority of women aren’t having children because they are physically unable to do so, but as you can see based on this very small poll, some are putting their careers ahead of a child, or are waiting to tie the knot. We all do things for very different reasons, or are forced to consider other options, medically.

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Since we all can agree that children are a HUGE responsibility, and not one to be taken lightly, let’s get into three things that should be considered, if and when you are considering children:

-Get Clear On The Status Of Your Reproductive Organs. It really doesn’t matter how old you are; you should make certain to always stay on top of your “lady parts” with your OBGYN. Hereditary medical conditions could potentially impact the ability to conceive, and if you are a woman who has experienced fibroids, these can also interfere with fertility. Always speak with your medical professional(s) to know what your options are. Adoption could certainly be another option on the table.

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-Get Clear On WHO You Are Having Children With. Let’s be real; the “who” matters just as      much as the “when”. We should already be super selective with who we choose to engage in sexual intercourse with. Place a HUGE emphasis on who you feel would be the best person to have children with. Not everyone is interested in getting married and having the “white picket fence” type of storyline; but you should still want to make the best situation for yourself and for your child. Of course there have been instances where people have been “blindsided” by lovers, and ended up feeling slighted when it comes to parenting, which is all the more reason to spend quality time getting to know people and paying attention to ANY signs and red flags.

-Get Clear On When The Time Is Right For You. I don’t know anyone who is operating on the same clock, and that’s perfectly ok. Just because everyone in your age group is “poppin’ up preggs” doesn’t mean that you’re missing out on anything in your own life. Some people are better prepared for this task early in their lives, and some are better prepared for this task later. As long as YOU are comfortable with where things are going, and you aren’t making a hasty decision to bring a child into the world, then you should be fine! You are never TRULY ready to have children, but timing can, and certainly will, play an important role in the decision to do so. Becoming a parent should be a very happy and inspirational time in your life; there’s nothing like hearing stories of women who weren’t ready to be Mothers, and regretted their decision to have children. A child is a total blessing; not a burden.

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While you wait, celebrate! Celebrate how far you’ve come in your career; celebrate the hurdles that you were able to avoid/bullets you were able to dodge; celebrate with your friends and loved ones on their bundles of joy. Maybe you aren’t supposed to carry; maybe adoption is great option! So many children need homes, and your home may be the perfect fit for a child in need. Be happy and content with what you have been able to achieve…and take comfort in knowing that you aren’t the only one Patiently Waiting To Parent!