black love

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What does Megan Goode, Ciara, Tia and Tamera Mowry all have in common? Besides the fact that each woman is successful in her right, they all took the vow of celibacy. That’s right, celibacy. Now, before you begin to jump into the deep end of the celibacy pool and drop all your potential boyfriend’s, let’s do a little homework. Of course, we all want that happily ever after type of love where the man of our dreams confesses his unyielding love for us. We’ve seen it in movies, television, books, listened to the music, and some variation of it on reality TV. So, yes true exist. Men can commit to a woman. They just need a little nudge in the right direction.  Every Queen deserves a King and the perfect love story to share with their kids and grand-kids. We just want to skip over the ugly details along the way. Now, along the way, you may kiss a few frogs, toads, and even a few bull frogs before Mr. Right shows up in your life. That’s okay. It’s all a part of the process of finding true love.  How do you determine your bull frogs from your toads to your future Prince Charming? Answer: celibacy.

Celibacy is a commitment to abstain from sex and a vow to commit your life to living righteously and obediently to the will of God. Consider it as the ultimate sacrifice for the best investment of your life. Sure, you may be thinking that’s a piece of cake if you’re not actively involved in a situation-ship with a man now or you prefer casual sex.  To be celibate means you give up sex until your boyfriend becomes your husband. Abstaining from sex while you’re single is completely different from celibacy. There’s no commitment involved in abstaining. You can have as much sex as you like whenever you want. If you’re not looking to settle down anytime soon, go for it girlfriend. But, if you’re looking to snag a husband in the next few years, it’s time to raise your standards and change the rules to your dating game.

Now, celibacy is easier said than said than done especially if you’re used to expressing your love inside the bedroom.  Celibacy is a test in your faith in God to deliver on his promise to bring you a love so fulfilling and rewarding you’ll be satisfied with the man He picks for you.

Sure, you’ll be tempted to scratch your itch or relieve your stress with your man or with any man. Celibacy is a time to refocus your energy on your goals, pursuing your purpose, and living a more fulfilling life until the man of your dreams walks into your life. The key to forgoing sex until marriage is to have a like-minded partner. That’s right, you will need to have a partner that is committed to celibacy as well. If you’re celibate and he’s not, well let’s just say that relationship will last as long as a hot perm on your hair. Just as anything else in life whether it’s friendship, partnership, or a relationship you should find a like-minded partner that will push you towards your fullest potential. Your fullest potential begins and ends with God.

We’re not judging you if you still want to soak a few wild oats before committing to celibacy. This walk is intended not only for the strong minded but also for the strong-willed. Just know that while you’re in between relationships, break ups and make ups, and in the middle of an it’s complicated situation-ship with a man. Just know that God is waiting for you to come to your senses with so and so and surrender to His will. He’s waiting to bring the man that is intended to love all of you into your life. Have fun girlfriend and always do what’s best for you! Don’t let your Mr. Right Now make you miss out on your Prince Charming!!